Moms. We have all been there. We have taken that first daring step into the wild unknown territory of parenting. We took these little bundles home, gotten them tucked in and then wondered aloud to ourselves “Now what?” Here you are with an entirely new perspective on life.
Meeting up for a coffee with your old friends is suddenly like planning a shuttle launch at NASA. We have schedules. Vital schedules that will determine if the kids will start screaming, sleep, even poop. You can’t leave the house before such and such time because they need their morning routine of breakfast, play in the bath, get dressed, and for you to reheat your cold again coffee. Then afternoons are hot out, and nap times.
Then comes the older kids. They come home from school and we might need to be there in case a kid bullied them on the bus or they have a huge project due tomorrow they “forgot” about. Let’s not forget to account for making dinner, bedtime stories, and falling asleep on your feet in front of the sink. Maybe you even made it far enough to collapse on your bed that is still covered in folded laundry. How, amid ALL of this, do you find a way to make a friend that can nod along with you on those crazy days where kids color on walls and dump things out of the refrigerator?
Having moved several times in the last years, I can sooo relate. Making mom friends is hard. Sometimes these fellow moms can be the difference between sitting down crying and standing up to dust ourselves off.
In comes the online dating game of the mom life. On Facebook there is a plethora of mom groups. All equally welcoming. You know how they say, misery loves company? Yep, you join, get an initial welcome from everyone, and then it is back to the continual complaints. Not exactly the positive relationship you were looking for.
Here are a few alternative ideas for you to make those needed mom connections.
Start with your local park. It will draw other moms from your area. Instead of standing there being a hover parent, step across the playground and talk to her! I know, it is so intimidating. She is always the mom with everything together. The one with extra snacks, and a perfect ponytail. Guess what? She wants someone other than a toddler to talk to too. Even the mom who walked out without a bra on under her baggy shirt and is hiding the dirty hair under a baseball cap. She doesn’t always look like that. She just needs to hear she isn’t alone with crazy demanding babies! One great way to keep getting to meet up with someone when you have made a connection is trade numbers. Yep, ask for her number. The boys used to do it with us and it worked then too (ask my hubby lol).
Obviously the last mentioned tactic works for more than just parks. There are some great indoor play places in the area for hot days. Find what works for you. You will already have something in common!
Next, if you are just feeling like you need a little more structured option check out one of the local mom groups. There is a great workout group that has playdates after. Fit4Mom has classes for any fitness level. They also have a free part called Our Village. It’s on Facebook and they have playdates and mom only things too. Amber is super welcoming and they meet up in Temple, and Belton. Another local group is the MOPs (Mothers of Preschoolers). I haven’t gone to any of the meetings, they have a couple groups so go online to mops.org and find the one nearest you. Another is just starting to form called MOMS Club. It is a great option since it highlights community service. You can go to momsclub.org to get contact info.
If reaching out just isn’t for you then there is still hope. Start on the Facebook groups. Join. Chat. Find people you connect with. Find a couple you connect with and set up a playdate somewhere you are both comfortable. This is how I met my good friend Ashley just after we moved here. One Facebook group that is great for info is “New and Not-So New Moms of Temple/Belton”, a private group you can ask to join that does have a screening process. It is an active group for playdates and information on the area as a mom. They also have a weekly book club on Monday evenings just for moms, and a once a week nature class for littles starting this fall. If you are a business mom check out “Central Texas Moms in Business”. It is a group to help network with moms who understand the struggle of a work/life balance.
Try all of these, or a few. Feel free to contact me here on CenTexFun.com or make comments below with other great mom dating tips and ideas!